Mission: Joy

For years I’ve been thinking something along the lines of “I should write a blog about living with [Fibromyalgia/Raynaud’s/carpal tunnel/PCOS/insert whatever other thing I’ve been told I now have]. It makes me unique, is something I deal with every day. Maybe someone else wants to hear about it or it can make someone else not feel as alone as I sometimes feel as a result of [whatever thing it is this week].” And maybe there is someone else who might want or need to hear what I have to say. Maybe my thoughts will resonate with them.

But the thing is, I’ve taken years to think about this and try to write. Sure I’ve been busy, but I don’t think that’s why I haven’t written about it. Maybe I just don’t know where to start? I started feeling this way so long ago, I don’t actually know where to begin my story. Starting is often the hardest part of any task. Maybe I’m worried that nobody will want to hear what I say? I don’t really think most people want to listen to someone else complaining about everything that is going wrong in their life. I don’t want to complain or alienate people.

Recently though, I’ve started to realize I just don’t want to write about Fibromyalgia, or PCOS, or Raynaud’s, or Restless Legs. They are not what makes me ME. I won’t let them define me. I don’t think that writing about it is going to make me feel better. So why would I actively choose to do something that won’t help me feel better? But then I come back around and argue that there are so many decisions I make, things I choose to do, and topics I worry about on a daily basis, that it would be difficult to write about my life without acknowledging the underlying reason for so many things I do.

I’ve arrived at this conclusion: I want to write about my life, not about my conditions. I want to treat this blog as a way of sharing parts of my life with others who may find something useful or entertaining in what I’m saying. There are too many great things happening to dwell on the not-so-great parts. I plan to focus on people, projects, and things that bring me joy. Hopefully by sharing what makes me joyful, I can share that joy with others also.